"True" Reflection.

Now that I look back on it, high school wasn't such a waste. I must have "learned" fifty thousand meaningless facts for a specific date, or "mastered" complex formulas for a brief period in time, but none of that matters. The truth is that in high school I have ascended to a higher existance.

If you take it as such, then I am a blasphemer. Regardless of semantics, the basic fact is that I have grown, and that you have grown as well. Like it or not, we're interconnected. Every meaningless conversation or opinion that you hear has a shape on who you are as a person, no matter how small or large their impact, you change them.

Thus, Sasha's idea that none of us can be a Washington or a Lincoln, that none of us will grow up to have the impact of Whitney or Ford, that idea is obsolete. Especially with the level of communication that we have today, nobody dies in vain. Even the child who dies at birth is a lesson, every miscarriage affects the world in one way, shape or form.

That being said, you can't afford to back down and slip into a meaningless existance. So many people waste all that they have, myself included. That's really depressing, to see so much lost for one reason or another, to see a mind wasted because it's too preoccupied with other goals.

But at the same time, there's happiness to consider. And that throws everything out of balance. Because some of the most successful people in life don't want any of it, and some people who live with nothing are happier than those with something.

That's really frustrating, you know? There's really no scale to measure ones success upon, but we all bitch and complain that someone has it better than us. Because someone always does have it better than us, and there are always people who have it worse than us. However, our losses are more pronounced than our wins, and what we do not have is always more influencial than what we do have and the grass is always greener on the other side.

That's because we kill the grass. Although there is only one person that I know that could kill grass simply by existing, so that's a metaphor.

So we kill the grass, we spill herbicide all over our lawns and then complain that it's ruined and seek something out. You can't stop it, I can't stop it, it's already programmed into us. You can't change who you were or what you've done, that's a fact of life, and it's no use betraying yourself because others tell you to.

So I walk on, as far forward as I can, taking whatever punishment may meet me along the way, because it's all that I can do. It's sort of funny, in a way, that Dr. Hillman taught us the most powerful article in the English language and most of us can't seem to touch upon it. Wait, let me rephrase that.

You can't seem to touch upon it.

I suppose we're all too scared, aren't we? "You" is such a confrontational word, and it leaves you open to so much criticism that you surely don't want to deal with. If you use the word "you", all of a sudden you're a bad guy. Well, that's all a matter of perspective really.

You'll never be a "bad guy" if you know the right people. If you connect with the right people on some superficial level, then you'll always be a good guy, no matter what your actions may say. Of course, there are exceptions, but for the most part if you act like a sheep, then you're a good guy.

But if you try to act on your own and you become independent, and God forbid you like it, then you are a villain. All of a sudden you're Machiavelli, you're Dracula, you're Stalin, you're Hitler, you're Lucifer and you're Satan.

It's like with a witch trial or getting out on parole, nobody wants to help you. They've all got an opinion of you, and each and every one of them wants something along the same lines.

Then again, assumption is the fruit of ignorance. That's not an idiom, it's a play off of a classic phrase, but it's still my idea.